The Conundrum of Heaven

Not here you say
uh uh
not in my house
not in my town
not here
nope

But you know it is not true
every day over coffee
reading the paper
watching the news
“ain’t it awful”
you know it
you all know it

Perhaps over there you say
those people
the ones who don’t live here
the ones who dress funny
the bombers
the bullies
the haters
it must be them

And I understand I frighten you
for I am old
as old as you are old
since the beginning
I have been with you
you have never left me
you have carried me forward
from cave days to modern times
you’ve kept me around
perhaps you find me useful
now and then

But still you deny me

A virus you may think
or a defect of the blood or dna
that manifests only
when an opening
a perfect coalescence
presents itself
and I insinuate into the crowd
the mob
the body politic
spreading virulence
through fear, and hate, and vitriol
infecting everything and everyone
until I am exhausted
then go back into hiding
but you know that is not true either

I sit here on your shoulder
reading what you read
watching what you watch
listening as you bemoan the state of the world
pondering what to do

Should you reason with me
or shout me down
should you stone me
or “nuke” me even
it makes me smile
the “lesser of two evils”
as though I can be both
lesser and greater at the same time

Should you ignore me
or pretend I am a fiction
or just bad behavior to be unlearned
that makes me smile as well

And just for fun
I’m sorry I can’t help smiling
consider for the moment my friend
consider what your world
your life
would be without me

Marv Himmel
June 8, 2016 ©

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